I offer the following article from Michael Grose to the parents of boys in our community.

One of the keys to parenting success is the ability to adapt strategies and principles to suit the gender of the children in your family. That’s easy if you share the same gender or were surrounded by siblings of that gender in your family origin.

It’s not so easy if your experience of children of a particular gender is thin, or you just can’t fathom what makes a gender tick. Here are some essential strategies to help you successfully parent the boy in your life.

Understand their psychology
Many boys feel uncomfortable standing out from the crowd and will go to extraordinary lengths to blend in – wearing the same clothes, dumbing down rather than standing above the pack, and enjoying the same interests as their peers. The need to fit in impacts so much of their behaviour and attitudes.

Work with their physiology
Boys are constantly fighting their physiology. Differing maturity rates affect boys’ school readiness, their transition to secondary school and their transition into adulthood. There’s no doubt – it takes longer to grow a boy!

Crack their communication code
Boys will respond if the communication method suits them. Time and space are important factors to use in your favour. The use of banter, shoulder-to-shoulder communication and movement are some other ways to get young male conversational clams to open up.

Match their relational style
Some boys like to talk, others like to share an activity, some like you as the adult to do something for them. Others are very kinaesthetic and love to be cuddled and hugged, while some just love gifts and mementos. Work out the relational preferences of the males in your life and you’ll discover a wonderful way to build or deepen your relationship.

Build a management repertoire on respect and fairness
Respectful, fair treatment are essentials if you want to gain a boy’s cooperation. Many learn from experience rather than the fine words of parents so be prepared to allow them to learn some of life’s lesson the hard way. They also respond favourably to visual measures such as gestures, charts and lists as they play to their strengths and take the authority away from you.

Know that confidence is key
Helping boys feel confident can be tricky. It’s part environmental – that is, allowing them to spend time in places and activities where they experience success. Part personal – that is, they respond to encouragement and private, descriptive praise (often rejecting public praise) and part patience, as it takes longer for many boys to find their feet.

Play to their learning strengths
Knowing a boy’s learning strengths can be the way to unlock his learning potential. My own son was not a great reader, but his visual acuity and oracy skills were exceptional. By allowing him to play to these strengths, while at the same time working on his literacy, he was able to leave school seeing himself with an abundance of confidence as a learner.

Build their emotional smarts
Boys education expert Ian Lillico believes that much of boys’ aggression that plays out at home and at school stems from a denial of their feelings. It’s essential to help boys recognise and give voice to their emotions safely and in healthy ways so they don’t act out angrily, aggressively, and violently.

Defuse their digital focus
The current crop of digital devices and online games that have many boys glued to screens with zombie-like expressions on their faces play right into the hands of boys. The need for balance between real world activities and the digital world has never been greater than it is for our boys right now.

Build an attitude of respect
Create conversations with boys about respectful treatment – what it looks like and feels like. Pick them up on disrespectful attitudes and behaviour they may show toward others, including siblings. Respectful relationships need to be a high priority when raising boys. Our daughters depend on it.

Coach boys in interpersonal skills
Girls are primed for interpersonal skill development while boys often need to be taught the intricacies and nuances of working with and relating to others. Give young boys scripts for making friends, asking a teacher for help or how to solve a problem with a mate. Coach teenage boys in the finer points of talking with adults, speaking in different situations and give them ideas about how they should speak to and treat girls.

In closing
Research tells us that parenting boys can be more problematic than parenting girls, particularly in the early and primary school years. With a solid understanding of what makes a boy tick, a toolkit at your disposal of boy-friendly communication, management and confidence-building techniques, the confidence to support your boy as a continuous learner and a willingness to coach him personal and respectful relationship skills you will be well-prepared to give your son the support and parenting, he needs to become a fine and successful young man.

Cross Country
Congratulations to all children who represented our school at the Belconnen District Carnival last Thursday. The children ran in lovely autumnal weather at the Stromlo Course in Molonglo.

Five children from St Matthew’s will now represent the Belconnen District at the ACT Carnival which will be held at the same venue.

The children who gained selection are:

• Alastair Molloy, 6^th place 8 yrs boys
• Elspeth Hamilton 1^st place 10 yrs girls
• Grace Brann, 6^th place 11 yrs girls
• Isaac Wells 2^nd place 11 yrs boys
• Owen Netting 7^th place 12 yrs boys

Thank you to Miss Dempsey for her coordination of the Cross-Country Program and supervision of the children on this day.

SAVE THE DATE
Our 50^th Anniversary Dinner is scheduled to be held at Pialligo Estate on Friday September 2^nd.

Tickets for the dinner will be on sale later in the year. In the meantime

please keep the date free, it promises to be a wonderful night.

The Benefits of an Inquiry Approach to Teaching and Learning
Over the past two years, teachers at St Matthew’s have investigated the benefits of pursuing an inquiry approach to teaching and learning. We’ve conducted a vast amount of research. Some of the key benefits include:

• The skills and strategies students use as they engage in a unit of conceptual inquiry will help them make sense of a complex, ever-changing world.
• Units of inquiry that are compelling, significant and intriguing develop confident, competent learners.
• Compelling, significant and intriguing units of conceptual inquiry increase empathy, and this makes the world a safer place.
• Employers are looking for employees with the skills and attitudes that can be successfully developed through conceptual inquiry.
• Teaching conceptual inquiry units makes teaching more rewarding.
• Tackling challenges with skills and strategies developed through conceptual inquiry makes us happier.
• Learning through inquiry helps students to deal with stress and lead healthier lives.

(Adapted from Claxton, 2018)

Teachers are now able to add to this initial list with ideas borne from experience. Here is what our teachers have to say:

• I see children ‘fly’ with topics that interest them.
• Students take ownership of their learning and are well-equipped to embrace change.
• Students are using higher order thinking skills and are developing deeper levels of understanding.
• I’m able to excite the children and I now have enthusiastic learners.
• Students and teachers have opportunities for innovative teaching and learning.
• The students and I learn and explore in many ways, both individually, and collaboratively.
• Students are stretching their thinking and learning in myriad ways.
• I’m able to use engaging teaching strategies.
• Student voice, student engagement and a greater ability to develop connections to other learning areas are clearly evident.
• Students apply skills that are learned in literacy and numeracy to authentic investigations.

Which of these benefits do you think is of most importance? Which of these challenges your thinking?

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